The Essentials When Advocating for Your Child
Here I present a few ideas that might serve as a framework for your special education advocacy. I encourage you to use these in everything you do in the special education process
Remember you know your child better than anyone else in the room. Each professional may know something in their field of expertise. But you are the expert on your child. These professionals may have degrees after their name. But you are the expert.
Go to no meetings alone. CSE meetings and other meetings about your child are emotional for every parent. Bring someone with you to at least be another pair of eyes and ears. In addition, every mother I worked with either volunteered this, or when I asked, confirmed it. If they brought their husband to the CSE meeting, even if he did not say a word, the meeting went better, and their child’s needs were better handled.
Assert yourself. The entire special education process is designed for the parent to be an equal partner with the school. Speak up. Ask questions. Especially when they use words you do not understand. And take notes during the meetings, whether or not you intend to do anything with them. You will look more serious in the eyes of the professionals.
Be polite, but remember these people do not have to be your friend. You just need to be able to work with them. Well, at least till things really fall apart. Even then, as hard as it might be, be polite.
Connect with your child’s teacher or teachers. Get into the school building if you can. If that is not practical, connect with the teachers the way they want to be connected — by email, text, phone, written notes. Communicate with the teachers often.
Do not hesitate to engage an Education Advocate. There are too few education advocates to meet the demand. So contact them before you think you need them and get on waiting lists. You might sign up the minute you start the special education process. Free advocates can be found at many of the independent living centers spread across the country. Another source: The Council of Parent Attorneys and Advocates https://www.copaa.org. An Education Advocate collaborates with you to get the program your child needs.
If things fall apart, you may decide to get a Special Education Attorney. The attorney can act as the buffer between you and the school district. Follow the attorney’s lead. They know how this works. And remember, if your attorney is successful, the school district pays their fee.
And remember entire the special education process is a legal process. This means that if something is not in writing, it may well not happen. This also means that if something is in writing, you can hold their feet to the fire to make it happen. Advocates and attorneys know how to do this.
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